In the Pits

I’ve been lucky enough to feel pretty good physically and emotionally for about 98% of my 16 weeks of pregnancy so far. When I woke up this morning, I had a feeling today would not one of those days. Physically I felt fine, but emotionally… That was another story.

I know I’m not the first pregnant woman to feel this way, but I’m having trouble coping with my weight gain. It’s a natural part of the process: eat nutritious foods and gain weight so that baby can grow big and strong. So why am I having so much trouble dealing with it?

How I saw myself when I looked in the mirror this morning.

In the early stages of my pregnancy, I ate a lot of junk because there wasn’t much that I wanted to eat that was good for me. I paid for it with a double-digit gain in the first 12 weeks. Luckily, it’s leveled off quite a bit since then, but I just woke up today feeling fat and disgusted with myself when I looked in the mirror. (Thanks, hormones, for blowing everything out of proportion.) I think I just need my belly to “pop” so that I actually look pregnant rather than just pudgy.

So, I need to get out of the pits. Every pregnancy is different and, while I may not be like other bloggers who gained less than 10 pounds at 30+ weeks (Comparison is the thief of joy, Tiffany…), I need to enjoy the ride and focus on the positives.

A dozen donuts would definitely make me happy, but it’s probably not a good idea.

So with that, I’ve decided to do the following to make sure I continue down the healthy [and happy!] path:

  • Use MyFitnessPal to track calories.  I’m not doing this to lose weight. Keeping track of my food intake will help assure me that I’m not consuming nearly as many calories as I think I am. I thought I’d be consuming 2,500 calories today (crazy brain), but when I pre-tracked everything, it turned out to be only around 1,600.
  • Get moving 4 – 5 times a week.  Now that the weather’s fining up and the sun is shining past dinner time, I have no reason to not go for a walk most days at lunch or after work. As my friend Lauren said, sunshine is your friend. I’ll continue to supplement walking with my prenatal workout DVD.
  • Take time to think.  I’m going to set aside some time every day to think about the changes I’m going through and how big and strong this little peanut is getting because of it.

I’m already feeling better. Chances are I won’t have another Debbie Downer episode for awhile, but I’ll do whatever I can to prevent a relapse. I doubt anyone wants to hear more whinging and whining from me again anyway.

What are some sure fire ways you pick yourself up
when you’re in a rut?

She’s Just Not That Into You

I don’t know if it was my two-week vacation, the New England cold weather front (that doesn’t seem to go away for 6 months), daylight savings, or maybe a combination of all of the above…. but I’m just really not into you at the moment, Running.

For the better part of the last year and a bit, my love/hate relationship with running has been mostly love, so I suppose it’s time that the hate/strong dislike part set in. I have zilch motivation to run because all I really feel like doing right now is eating and getting fat. I worked too hard to lose 22 pounds to gain it all back at once, but I kiiiiiind of feel like packing on a little bit of winter weight.

20121120-143233.jpgOf course, I won’t allow myself to do that.. I couldn’t because of my own neurosis, so you would think that alone would be motivation to get up and moving, but it’s not working very well. The fact that I’m also not gaining any weight despite not exercising isn’t helping my case at all either. The other night, I was using tongs to flip sweet potato fries, and my arm started getting tired from being held up in one position for a couple of minutes.

Hmmm… I should probably start lifting weights again too…..

I wouldn’t want all that work and progress I’ve made over the last year to go down the toilet, but I need to find a way to get motivated. Maybe I should set my goals small again and simply focus on that.

What’s a simple goal for me? Running for 30 minutes a day, 3x a week again. And doing strength training once a week. No more stressing out over this 5 mile/10K business for the time being (which I’m completely winging on Thursday with Tracey BTW). I’ll admit it: Running for an hour is boring to me. Long distance running just wasn’t in my destiny, I guess, and I’m okay with that.

Maybe my passion for running will come back when the weather starts warming up, the birds chirp again, and flowers start to bloom… which likely won’t be for another 5 months. But for now, I’m going to focus on the little things, and hopefully the excitement for running will return.

Out With The Old

Ahhh, what can I say about my running as of late?  Well, not much simply because I haven’t been running that much.  Sigh.

Last month I had a good month in terms of mileage.  I was feeling super motivated to run quite often, and hit my highest monthly total so far since I’ve started running.  Thirty-seven miles is not much for most people, but it is a lot for me.  This month, however, is a whole other story.

The first two weeks of May started off awesome!  I decided to increase my mileage and shoot for 4 – 5 miles and I did it, running my first 5-miler on the 1oth! Wooo, go me!  Well, since then, ppppppfffffpppttthhhhhh.  I’ve run a total of 10 miles in the last two weeks.  I will chaulk some of it up to some stomach issues I was having, which makes it difficult/unpleasant to run, but the truth is I simply haven’t had much mojo.

I know, I know.  Most runners hit slumps and we all lose our mojo from time to time, but WTF.  It’s not like I’m some super star runner training for a half or something crazy like that.  I run 3 – 3.5 miles a few times a week.  I should not be burnt out from that.

Rich has been traveling a lot lately, so I know that has something to do with that and the effect it has on my mood.  I keep forgetting to remind myself of the silver lining that everyone keeps telling me about — that his time away is a good opportunity for me to focus on myself.  It’s a good opportunity to focus on running and exercise.  I just need to stop being so crazy and clingy and stuff… it’s not a good look for me.

With that said, Friday is the start of June (umm when did that happen?), so out with the old [attitude] and in with the new!  It’ll officially be summer soon, which means blue skies, running in tank tops, and puppies galore in the park!  I think I got my mojo back. =)

My mantra for the month of June!

Do you ever hit a slump?  What helps you find your mojo?